Don't Look Down On Yourself

In my chat with a young woman who came to me with a question bothering her mind after my presentation in a motivational talkshop last month, I have come to realize that certain expressions need to be explicitly interpreted for easier understanding.
This young woman probably in her early twenties came to me to ask me what I meant by, “acting like I’m the best thing to have happened to humanity”, “whether it does not imply adorning and adopting peacock’s plumage and approach to the rest of humanity?” It might have sounded easy to you but it is not quite easy, as I earlier had thought. This young woman had misinterpreted and misunderstood the lesson in acting like the best thing to have happened to humanity to mean becoming proud and arrogant.
I was quick to point out to her that the teaching in the expression is simply telling you not to look down on yourself no matter what you are going through in life. No matter what life is forcing down your throat, don’t ever act or take it to be the end to your very existence. You must always come out cheerful everyday with the best of expectations on your mind that your today will definitely be better than your yesterday. Every day comes with its possibilities and opportunities, and challenges. Your duty it is to pray God to provide you the clues for discovering opportunities and meeting with and as well as defeating their ever-attendant challenges. With prayers, you are more than a conqueror. Think of the wisdom in Melanchthon’s quote, “Trouble and perplexity drives me to prayer, and prayer drives away perplexity and trouble.” Or this from Edward Young, “In every storm that either frowns or falls, what an asylum the soul has in prayer.”
Equally I gave her a scenario. Among people who live around you, some of them are happy seeing you facing difficulties even when they are related to you, while some would be there giving you moral support that will keep you going amidst your long-sufferings. And this is where the challenge comes in with having not what one is doing and being expected to face the world with smiles when there is no cause to smile. You suddenly loose your job and as you have no other source of income, your financial tap stops running. Your friends start leaving in their droves and those who are around you start looking down on you. They remain around you to show you how their lives have become better than yours. This you’ll discover when you ask for financial help from any one of them. Though you’ll say I’m generalizing, definitely, there must be some exceptional friends. All these will make you feel unloved, used and appear useless to humanity.
So you see, this is where you are most likely to catch my drift. When you have been made to eat the humble pie by your fair-weather friends, don’t let them know you miss them or that any one of them could put you down. Let them see a steely you who is un-put-down-able. You can even act like royalty. It will keep them bemused but you are in pursuit of happiness and achieving contentment even in your situation - situation they would not know how to handle in their own time except they come to you for help. It is then you’ll understand the beauty of the experience you have acquired not looking down on yourself when things went rough on you. Of course they’ll be shocked by your audacity and say all unfavourable sorts about you. The one thing they will surely say to your hearing is the fact that you are pretending to be having things going for you as they use to whereas you are only being too proud to let it show. Yes! Don’t let anybody read your mind’s construction on your face, in your words and actions. Remember, you are a man/woman of steel. You are sufferable but you will not remain down forever. And now, let me go spiritual. Everything happening in your life is divine-designed except those ones we brought on ourselves. Huh? So there are rooms for carefulness here.
You will learn to see the good side of life always so you will not loose the fight to your daily challenges. Also, you will remain focused as you explore every opportunity that comes your way as you work towards getting your life back. And mind you, one slip might be very dangerous, as it would mar you for the rest of your life.
The most important character trait you must be conscious of and eschew is pride. Now you will say I’ve contradicted my admonition to act like the best thing to have happened to humanity. No! Far from that! A cliché says pride goes before the fall whereas my teaching here is saying you must not loose your dignity - your sense of self worth when things go wrong. Always have it at the back of your mind that things can always get better. It is not about you looking down on people and feeling like no one is as good as you are. Do away with arrogance and pride and then you have shown the world you are a well-heeled intellectual with lots of wisdom going for you.
Now, put on that your most expensive wear and go out and don’t you dare turn yourself into a recluse – a social leper. You deserve more from life to let your challenges take you with them. So look them and your mockers in the face and tell them your best is yet to be celebrated.
I want you to know that you are on sabbatical and you’ll soon be all that you have always wanted to be. Now get up and show the world some smiles and find out your true friends. Cheers!